Faith Series - Celebrate your progress

Have you remember to celebrate your progress?

Gitzengirl’s article http://gitzengirl.blogspot.sg/ reminded me that we should celebrate our progress.

It is when we keep trying and trying and striving over our daily goals, schedules, deadlines and expectations that we need the fuel of celebration to get on with our journey.

Remember to:

. Celebrate your victory everyday over fear and having faith.

. Celebrate when you get through difficult circumstances.

. Celebrate when you have done the right thing God wants you to do despite all the resistance.

. Celebrate God’s love for you during days you feel that you are lonely.

. Celebrate your passion for righteousness when your tears fall for injustice you see.

. Celebrate whenever you have overcome all odds or adversity.

. Celebrate your faith to move in the path in which you have decided without looking back, despite rain or
  storm.

. Celebrate your unwavering perseverance to see things in the light of His glory in the midst of worldly views.

. Celebrate the faithfulness of God in seeing you through your struggles.

. Celebrate your determination in refusing to follow the normal.

. Celebrate the courage to be authentic and different.

. Celebrate the dawn of a brand new day.

And Celebrate the special you.

Faith Series - Choose a topic

Can you propose a topic to write for the faith series?

Faith Series - Exemplifying Soul

To have a real life person exemplifying faith in action speaks more than a million words.

Let me introduce you to a fellow blogger and writer Robbie Leonard who started writing in March 2012.

It is my honor that he has answered my request to him to write an article about Faith and here it is:

Faith in God is minimalist to the highest level

Thank you Robbie. This is part of his excerpts about himself:

"From the beginning overcoming obstacles has become a part of who I am. It all started with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck at birth and continued with me being born with DMD (Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy). The twinkle in my eye never went away because that spark of determination grows within my soul every passing day.

Life has tested me through various trials and tribulations, such as transitioning from the walking world to a new path on wheels to using a ventilator. With all I have been through, God gave me the gift of an inner strength to find deeper meaning through all experiences to learn valuable lessons to share with the world. "


Indeed he is a determined soul and an inspiration

Faith Series - Saying No to fear

I have faced countless fears in my life.

I am sure you too. Fear of the unknown. Taking on new challenges, adapting in new places.
Facing condemnation or betrayal from the closest people you have trust. Facing pressure from people who are manipulative or oppressive or even threats. Fear ridden ministers that pressure you for obedience to God etc.

Fear can grab our focus and attention and lived us paralyzed. I have my worst fears - of losing my mother but God has by His grace saved her. I have the worst fear of not able to get out of my depression and thought to getting myself institutionalised.

Most of the time, fear and anxiety are traits that people viewed as a taboo , traits which are considered of weakness or illness by the society. By sharing, the victim fear that it will cause isolation  from his/her friends and look at as negative or peculiar. Obviously, I will think that it is so important that we opened up to share our personal moments, in the pit, whether you are journeying out from the rocky path or just grieving and trying to rebuild your life.

It is so important because it is a platform where we can start rebuilding our life again. Most people who suffered and have been through trauma, trials and losses in their life will tend to keep to themselves, become bitter and resentful, or otherwise overtaken by sorrow and grief. There are simply few channels by which they can open up personally and let off their suppressed emotions. And most time, when they rebuild their life, they may run into resistance more than the destruction itself. When things fall apart, it is as if life is walking on a tight rope and a balancing act. One push or shove, we will tend to tremble up and go weak on our knees.

I am starting to rebuild my life from my broken world and looking forward from others like you to share with me how to.

Simple steps. Will you like to share with me  your personal victory and how you get over stages of crisis in life. Write to me at tellout.mysoul@gmail.com , and if you grant me the permission, I can post up here as encouragement to others as well.

Read www.yvonnefoong.com . She is a brave girl and I will like to share some of her excerpts:

"There is an advice that Christians like to say to encourage each other out of habit. That is the phrase, "have faith". It is probably of the most over-used phrases of encouragement.

Faith is something that we need to cultivate over time. It doesn't just appear the moment we want it. It is not something that God gives to us on a silver plate, so to speak.

We need to cultivate faith daily. It takes willpower, determination and perseverence for faith to develop and strengthen.

To begin with, you can list five things that you love and are thankful for each day. Let this feeling of love and thankfulness fill your entire being throughout the day. "

Follow up with Grandma Ho

I am so excited to share this.

I ran into Grandma Ho today. She is getting back to work.
She is seeked out by the supervisor who apologised and by the field management who went and visit her.
She is able to voice out her grievance.

Though I did not share that the call was made. I think I fought like a cat. I am just glad that she has a work to carry on.

Thank you for your prayers!

Read also Robbie Leonard http://robbieleonard.com/about his toughest cat Mickey. Its a lovely narration.

Grandma Ho

I asked her how I should call her. She says, "call me Ho as that is my last name".

I say I will call her Grandma Ho or Po Po Ho. She is 75 years old. Out of respect.

I ran into her while having my lunch at a vegan stall lately. She always eat there.
I came to know that she works as a cleaning lady. She cleans restrooms - office toilets. She is thin, frail and walk with a hunch but with steady firm steps. Grandma Ho has been washing toilets for ten years.
From 6 am in the morning, she left her house, took a bus and reach the office towers, did her duty and home at 6 pm. Everyday from Monday to Saturday.

Her husband passed away of age and she is childless. Lived in a one room rental flat all by herself.
Her weekdays are time spent on watching TV, chinese and korean dramas. Her weekends are spent on walking around the street and having meals at the coffeeshop.

Recently I ran into her again. And asked her how she is. She said "I quitted my job". Why Grandma Ho?

"Well my supervisor has been unfairly treating me. A day ago i requested for half day to do an errand and I was called back. And after I arrived, instead of apologies, I received a glare and unhappy snap from him."
It happens. I couldn't sleep the whole night out of anger. Sometimes he is fine, sometimes he is just snapping at me. For five years, I have been working and even when I am sick, I came to work. I took only 7 medical leave days out of the five years. "

I sense her devotion to her work. Ten years have become a routine for her. I sense her anguish and her sadness as her eyes went red when she stammered her words. I gave her a hug and offer to bring her to coffee. " I will be fine" she said, " I will live day to day".

Any savings? I probed further. "Little.."

Then she went off. I stood there, startled, surprise, angry. I walked following her but later having to run an errand , I went off to another direction. Not feeling as good, I decided to trace her to find out where she is going. I feel I have more to say to her. More to say to encourage her.

What I saw in the next instance, broke my heart to BITS. I saw her standing alone at the office tower where she works. A tiny figure at a corner, watching the office people throd by. Ladies in powdered make-up, richly dressed with accessories, men in professional suits and ties.

She just stood there. I took a detour from level 2 and went down to level 1.
" Ho Po Po, why are you standing here...??"
" No, I am just waiting to get back to work." Her reply just put me into tears.
" when I quit, I will return this badge and I will keep this pulley." She said in chinese. My eyes turn red.
The badge pulley is so old and tattered but it mean't so much to her.

I gave her a big hug. Got her name , got her number. Ask for who her supervisor is.
I continue to talk with her until she is ready to go back to work. I shared with her that I understand her as I came across such threats and bully in my working life and most time such oppression left us weak and helpless.

After the conversation ended, I pulled out my mobile, grabbed the tower management office number and started pouring out this story. The lady at the reception listened at my rattering away at her plight and I started to hear her voice break. I managed to reach the field manager in person.

I asked that Grandma Ho be reinstated. I asked that the management will give recognition, not bully or manipulation. I asked that mutual respect be given. I asked that they should visit her at the working place - the toilets when she spent her most time of her life working in. I stated her devotion at work. And I ask that this issue be looked into. A devoted worker do not deserve such treatment. In fact, she ought to be given a ten year award.

This is a social issue that stemmed out of a turbulence, modernised world at this. Paradigm shift..moral shift..
The weak cant reach up to the authorities, needless to say someone who has lack of intellect or language capability to speak back or seek help. She is not english literate and little chinese except dialect.

Such oppression act should be stemmed and replaced by righteousness.

Can you help too? Do a bit to stem out any bully or manipulation in any where you witness? It'll all adds up.
Can you pray for Grandma Ho that all be well?

Thank you

Busy days

I ought to keep my blog updated but I have not any.

In the following weeks, I hope to log in at least one article per week.

Thanks for sending me emails at tellout.mysoul@gmail.com and providing encouragement.

I have read every of them and appreciate all the comments.

A heartbreak

Becoming single again after spending 15 years with my first and last boyfriend since twenties. He left me without a face to face conversation except I noticed that he began to drift apart more and more in the last few months. It was a dramatic breakup.

I still recall how the conversation went when he revealed the truth that he found someone else. I was in a state of shock. I rememembered I was getting myself off to a little excursion to the park, for a long day stroll when intuitively, I sensed something was not right. The usual dinner dates are off. He worked late nights more. And he began to remark my lack of makeup and frequently wearing the same kind of clothes.

I can sense the cold shoulders but decided to get on with my usual routine. Until the day when I am supposed to start my new job, a week before, I received the cruel word from him. I was appalled & shattered in tears. I was full of anger and bitterness. He left without an apology. He left with meeting me up for a last explanation. Who was she? 15 years made up almost a quarter of decade, we are so close to getting a house together. His sister called to threaten me to leave his rental place when I have been putting up in the last 9 months. She gave me 6 weeks to pack and relocate to another place.

Six weeks was a record short week for someone grieving over the loss, getting over the rude shock of being betrayed and then having to pick up the pieces and packed my things into boxes and calling for search of another rental place. I sank to a depression and was in bed for 3 days. All I can recall was that I have spiralled off to a depression and later even contemplated suicidal thoughts. I called to the new workplace to delay my start at work by a week, went to a doctor who by chance, she was a saviour. I spent 2 days at the clinic, crying my heart out.

I pushed myself out to get myself out of his place, and same time, devastated at the sudden change of attitude towards me from him and his sister. His sister threatened to throw out my things if I did not respond within the 6 weeks and I hear myself begging for time. Leaving at the mercy of someone you  know for 15 years? Strangers are better treating you more humanely that someone close like this.

So I did. That explained my lack of blogging for the few months. I sent off my things to the warehouse, donated my stuff to the Salvation army, and went searching for a place.

I was in depression for a couple of months and well the new job for a start is a bumpy ride. Demand was high and I feel life all snuffed out of me. Strangers were movers who helped me, agents that came to assist me for a house search, a doctor who was compassionate to spend some of her clinical time talking to me, we spent most time at dinners that she brought. Strangers were fellow church brothers and sisters that reached out for some prayers and support. Most time, I reached out as far as I could for God.

Jesus is with me. When I was so tired at the end of the day and asked for God that I will like to go to heaven, He whispered John 11:25 .

I won't want to die, I will want to live.

In the middle of a pause

Midweek is always the busiest when things get a start on Monday. Interruptions and distractions tend to cause delay even with some planning ahead. I often was watchful and reminded myself to take a pause from the chain of work tasks, personal assignments and to-dos for a step back to see if I can streamline my schedule better.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with the deadlines and committments and wonder if the use of my time to deliver the decisions I made daily are indeed producing any fruits of labour. Is it leading me to the results I want? Already as it is, decision making can be difficult amidst all the complexities and often, it takes lots of PRAYER.

Today I took another pause again and placed aside all the work from my table and picked up Elisabeth Elliot's book - Keeping a quiet heart. In the article "Spiritual oppression" (its intriguing she titled the article as this but later I realised why so). She commented as a missionary, writer, speaker and author of several books that she often feel overwhelmed by work that need to be done and the utter inadequacy to cope. She chanced upon a letter written to her late father, who was an editor of Sunday Times school on the verge of a nervous breakdown and consoled by this old veteran counsel in the letter to him :" I feel that you must count it all joy that you are passing through this phase of difficulty, for they are sure signs that God is blessing you. "

How does Elisabeth Elliot interpret it to her circumstances? Here is an excerpt of what she wrote: "Wasnt it a wonder that this letter has been preserved so that I chanced upon it during the hour of my need? That it is so like the Lord, for it is through the tender austerity of our very troubles that the son of the man comes knocking. In every event, He seeks an entrance to my heart. Yes, even in my most helpless, futile, fruitless moments. The very cracks and empty crannies of my life, my perplexities and hurts and botched up jobs, He wants to fill with Himself, His joy, His life. The more unsatisfactory my performance, the more He calls me to share His yoke. "

I sense God entering into my heart the moment I read this. Yes indeed in trying to keep up with daily expectations, I feel overwhelmed by the burden and commitments. Sometimes fear will creep in and joy dissipated in the anxious effort to keep up the results I desire. Sometimes, even the thought of whether the decisions are in line of God's will can perplex us.

Ain't such an opposition that we faced spiritually most of the time ? I was alert that I ought to look up to Him rather than looking at my sacrifices and toil. I feel the need not to push myself beyond what I can take, my limits and my constraints. But to STOP and TAKE A PAUSE to honor the work that I am doing. I have measured myself too rigidly against the set of rules and expectations that I ought to be, which in paradox sent me crumbling by my own standards. The gripping of the flesh is so powerful that we cannot allow ourselves to let go of "I should". I began now to read more into the article title. I realise the spiritual opposition that I am facing. And often we collapsed under fatigue, disappointment and guilt that we are such utter failures in keeping up. And we were reminded not to moan or complained, the increasing guilt threw us further down the mudslide.

This is not God's intention for us. Letting go is the key. Letting go and leaning on God rathar than relying ourselves and surrendering ourselves everyday to Him , as we patiently trust Him and pray for His help to take us through the daily decisions and work and through the unknowns of the future. In such circumstances, I have to lay everything before Him faithfully and let Him lead me across.

In the middle of the pause, God brought on this revelation to me. Can we pause too, for a little more while as you, my dear readers read this. That in the light of everything, we pray that

"Help us Lord, to know you better and help us keep our focus on you."

Gratitude List

I suppose everyone come across this subject in any book or reading about it in one way or another.

Have you ever tried writing your gratitude list every day? And I mean in discipline, setting aside some minutes every day to write the list. Beside positive things, you can write about your emotions and feelings and frustration so that they’ll not be accumulated up and get all stuffed inside. Trust me, it helps. Write them down and you’ll feel lighter for the day. Here's mine for today:

Dear God, I am thankful that

1. I have a good walk to the train station today although I know that it will be a heavy work day and I feel stressful but I know that the day will end well.

2. I decided to have a short Sabbath evening tomorrow. I have a busy work schedule and classes three times at night and church and my exercise workout on Sunday. My flesh tells me I don’t think I can get through the week! But I am on my way to Wednesday now. This Gratitude list really helps.

3. I have a better sleep yesterday night, no more recurring dreams! Thanks, Lord!

4. I should be able to stay up tonight to finish on reading Book 2 from my class. And review the September exams paper. I have conquered 6 papers for now!

5. I am looking forward to meeting Aunty Nancy in the upcoming seminar on Saturday morning. She is such an inspiring figure, having done missionaries and led in high positions in the social service sector. The workshop is about Called to Do Good Work: A Vision for Vocational Holiness by Dr. Gordon T. Smith.

6. I have a significant responsibility at work to push the 13 APJ countries to keep their certifications in compliance for an upcoming CSAT review. It is quite a tedious project. But each day as I know I will deliver and have done my best, God will do the rest.

7. Today as I am crossing the road, hurrying towards lunch. I saw a simply adorable baby and smiled at him. He returned the most shy, smiley back and made my day!

These are just some of the points I have jotted down during the day and I intend to do that for the rest of 2012 as a Gratitude Project. Try it, you will be surprised of the quiet joy it brings.